


Sunlight: The Void (Those Who Died)

by EdwardNotSoLittle



Series: Sunlight [4]
Category: The Terror (TV 2018)
Genre: Afterlife, Broken Hearts, Broken Promises, Depressing, Despair, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Empathic links, Grief/Mourning, M/M, Mental Breakdown, Mental Link, Psychological Horror, cannon character deaths, supernatural planes of existence, terror bingo
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-10-23
Updated: 2020-03-18
Packaged: 2020-12-31 21:10:36
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 5,265
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21152267
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/EdwardNotSoLittle/pseuds/EdwardNotSoLittle
Summary: Sunlight: The Void (Those Who Died)Summery: A look into what happened to those who died.Note!!! IF YOU WANT TO FOLLOW ALONG WITH THE SUNLIGHT SERIES, Sunlight Chapter 6 is a MUST before you read this one or you will be lost!!~ Sunlight: Chapter 6https://archiveofourown.org/works/19888900Otherwise this can be read as a heartbreaking, sad, and angsty past Joplittle and past Fitzier fic if you're into that sorta thing.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> _“It is complicated Sir, and I still have trouble believing what everyone has experienced as well, but I will start by saying that Dr Goodsir was right Captain.. there was wonder in that place.”_
> 
> _Francis could recall the words that had come from the good doctor, and he also remembered that Edward Little had not been in that camp when they were said._
> 
> _“The men, but they are-”_
> 
> _"Everyone is there Sir, James, Lieutenant Irving, Mr Blanky, Hartnell, Dr Goodsir, Lieutenant Hodgson, Lieutenant Le Vescante, Sir John... even Mr Hickey and the creature. When a soul passes in that land where that creature once roamed, it moves to a different plane of existence, a white or sometimes black void."_
> 
> _He couldn’t believe what he was hearing, was Edward saying that everyone was alive?_
> 
> _“No, Captain, we are very much gone… but in our state, Sir, it is neither a heaven nor hell.. yet it's not a torment of purgatory either. The only people to be seen are the men and creatures who died there. They look as they did when they died, but there is no more blood, no gore, there is no cold or madness. Mr Blanky still has his wooden leg, Sir John too, Mr Hickey has a massive scar in his abdomen from the beast. Some people get along other's don't. The creature is now more docile and tends to lay around most of the day ignoring us.”_
> 
> _"Those with connections left in your world, still feel their loved one's emotions. Family, friends, sweethearts... we can feel their mourning, happiness, love, and despair. Yet we do not know the state of them. The last image we were to ever see of them was before we died. We can feel them, but we can't see them." ** ~ Edward Little **_
> 
> _ ** Sunlight: Chapter 6**_

____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

**~ October 24th, 1848 ~**

____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

Edward was freezing.

Cold...

It was so unbearably cold...

As he watched his love tremble within the nest of blankets a feeling of dread took hold of him.

It was so, so unbearably cold.

With the Arctic winter now only in its third week of beginning, the cold had come in without warning.

The snow had started six days ago, and just the sight of it's white powdery appearance had sent Tom into an uncontrollable panic.

On the third day of howling winds and billowing snow something inside his poor love had snapped and he had run off without a word while he had been sleeping.

When he had woken to find Thomas not on watch, not even in the camp he had panicked, grabbed his pistol, those annoying wire snow goggles, yanked on all his layers, and began searching in hopes to find him.

Find him he did, and it had damn near broken him when he did so.

____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

_"Thomas!" his voice crackled from his dry throat._

_It was so cold! What was he thinking running out here in this!?!_

_He made his way up a small crest of of ice and his heart fell when his eyes spotted the blue great coat he had... borrowed from Le Vescante. It was much too big for Thomas, Henry had been bigger than he, but they had to make use of everything._

_Jopson was kneeling in the snow beside a pressure ridge that had a hollowed out bit at the bottom._

_He was looking down at something and once Edward was close enough he could see a wounded Arctic fox, whimpering, snarling, and whining as it tried to rise._

_Thomas was crying. Why? It would mean they had something to eat besides... fallen companions._

_He was about to ask when he heard several small whines from the hollow in the pressure ridge and it was now that he saw two very young... what did they call baby foxes again? Kites? No, that wasn't right. He couldn't remember things very well anymore._

_"Tom?" he called softly lifting his goggles up a little bit._

_"I-I didn't know it had kits..."_

_'Kits! Yes that's what they are called! Thank you love!'_

_"Oh.. well, that's okay Thomas. You couldn't have known." he stated softly._

_His love sobbed brokenly insistently shaking his head._

_"W-Who will.. take care of them now? They h-have.. no one. It's my fault..."_

_The man he fell so very hard for was breaking more and more every day. The Thomas Jopson he knew while he loved animals he would never have wept over something like this, he knew how cruel the world was... they both did._

_He could feel tears burning in his eyes, "Tommy.. they'll be fine."_

_"G-God abandoned them..."_

_"Thomas..."_

_"God abandoned the Captain..."_

_The reply stunned him to absolute silence._

_"God abandoned him... abandoned him just like God abandoned us..."_

____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

Half-way through the trek back Tom had started having difficulty with his eyes and eventually he'd had to rely on him for guidance.

Of course having snow-blindness once before, Edward already knew what it was.

"Edward?"

The sweet soft voice, now broken with a hoarse rasp snapped him from his thoughts.

"Yes Thomas?"

A silence before he got his answer. "Just wanted to make sure..."

Edward's heart fluttered and he patted Thomas's thigh lovingly.

"Thomas Jopson, I love thee, I'm not going anywhere, I promise."

His love let out a small appreciative noise turning to look in his direction eyes still covered with the strip of cloth he had used to cover his sun damaged eyes.

"I love you too Edward." he whispered and let out a tired yawn.

He couldn't help but smile at the cute little noise and he leaned down to kiss his forehead, being mindful of the metal chains that could freeze to his love's skin instantly if he wasn't careful.

"Get some rest Thomas, I'll be here." he said letting his hand come to rest on his lover's cheek.

Jopson just nodded. It didn't take long for him to fall asleep.

Edward had sat there for about two hours in that unbearable cold when he felt sleep calling to him.

There hadn't been a single thing spotted in months... well besides those foxes...

Surely, he could rest his eyes for a little while... then he'd have to see about food.

Exhausted and finding the plan appropriate, he let his eyes slide closed falling asleep not long after.

_________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

Edward felt warm.

Warmth.

Warmth...

He hadn't felt such a sensation in so long... it almost felt as wrong as it did pleasing.

He could hear humming.

A man humming.

But it was wrong.

That wasn't Jopson's beautiful voice humming the melody.

Something was very wrong...

"At ease Lieutenant, all is well."

That voice! It was... Commander Fitzjames?

Very slowly he opened his eyes to find himself seeing nothing but white. He was laying on his back on the... ground? 

What... what was going on?!?

Indeed. Commander Fitzjames sat next to him.

"You made it! Good to see you, sailor."

Edward gawked and his mouth opened to speak, but he couldn't find the words, happy to see the dashing captain... but uncertain why he was.

Fitzjames rose to his feet and extended a hand to help him up which he took after a moment of hesitance.

"Sir, I-"

Out of nowhere an unstoppable wave of panic rushed over him, and he wanted to curl into a ball screaming and crying!

This... This feeling.... these emotions... somehow they didn't feel like his own, yet it was somehow projected onto him. It was so intense that his entire body shook and his legs gave out dropping him to his knees. Tears of defeat leaked from his eyes as he clutched his head tightly.

The only thing on his mind despite this episode was a name.

Thomas.

He could vaguely feel Fitzjames rubbing his shoulder and smoothing back his hair now covered with sweat.

"Why.... W-What is this....!?!" he screeched trying not to break down sobbing.

Fitzjames took his face into his hands being mindful of the chains.

"Oh.. I know, I know... it takes time to get used to. Shh... Shh... deep breathes Edward. It'll pass once he settles. I wager he woke up and this will be the worst of it."

His attention earned, he looked at Fitzjames in silent horror.

"W-Who!? Where am I!?!"

____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

**~ The Arctic ~**

____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

He had stirred from his slumber to feel Edward's hand resting on the side of his face as he sat on watch.

The hand it was freezing... to an unnatural level... even for the cold of this place.

It woke him up instantly and he ripped the blindfold off trying to squint through his snow-blindness. Though he knew Edward wanted him to keep his eyes covered but he didn't care at this point. He struggled into a sitting position dragging a blanket to wrap around himself as he did, his teeth chattering as the blindingly white snow outside billowed around their tent.

"Ed..Edward?" he called for him softly voice crackling.

Silence.

He groped about blindly as he tried to locate Edward, but finally his fingers found his lover's great coat, he recognized the patch he'd made on the shoulder. The coat that was now much too large for him. Feeling up the man's body eventually he raised a frostbite mangled hand to his love's face and his mouth dropped open in silent horror. His bottom lip wavered as his eyes filled with tears.

"E-Ed...ward..." he croaked softly giving the older man a rough nudge.

Stillness.

Silence.

Coldness.

"L-Love...?" he tried again his hands started to tremble.

'No...'

Thomas let his hand slide down in gentle caresses down to his neck where he should feel a pulse.

Nothing.

He felt down his neck, shoulders, and arms until he stopped at his wrist. With a small despairing sob he grabbed the large cold hand carefully between his and turned it over. He put his fingers to it.

Nothing.

Within seconds, Third Lieutenant... No! He didn't want the promotion! Petty Officer Thomas Jopson felt his world shatter into a million tiny glass pieces that were set ablaze.

Alone.

He was alone.

There was no one else but him.

"E-Edward! No, no, please.. w-wake up!!" Jopson wailed though his voice came small, cracked, and broken by chattering teeth from exposure.

____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

**~ The Void~**

____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

"NO!! I have to go back!! He needs me damn it!!!" Edward screamed in fury staggering to his feet.

His whole body was trembling with vertigo, his own outrage was clashing with unbearable rough waves of fear, and his mind knew not what to process.

Commander Fitzjames looked at him sadly.

"You can't. I-I know it's hard..."

Edward started pacing, or more staggering like a drunkard as his body tried to function through all the chaos overloading the man's senses.

Even now after the time since he'd left Francis he still didn't know how to explain the... phenomenon of having another person's emotions invading one's mind.

It was violating at it's worst and comforting at its best.

The feelings could be enough to cripple one's movements here, especially in the beginning. Panic was something that had been most common with all of the men upon arriving in such a confusing place.

Edward was panting his face flushed red with anger and hurt, but those eyes looked like smouldering coals as he stopped abruptly, the chains dangling from his face chinking together as they swayed.

"Send me back! Send me back this instant!!"

____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

**~ The Arctic ~**

____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

"Y-You promised... that.. that you wouldn't..."

He couldn't even speak the words, instead he collapsed against Edward's cold body and his shoulders shook with loud infuriated sobs of pure hopelessness.

Everyone was dead.

Everyone was dead.

Except him.

He was alone...

Alone in this horrible hell that had taken everything from him... taken everyone from him.

His friends. His captain. His lover.

Everyone.

Why couldn't he have died before Edward?

Wait! They had guns! He could...

No... No Edward burned them.. so that he couldn't... he'd tried earlier.

All they had was a pistol.. with only three bullets left.

But how was he to find the gun?! He couldn't see a thing just bleary white from his snow-blindness.

" Please... Please... d-don't leave me alone... oh God please... please wake up... E-Edward.. I need you... please..." he sobbed brokenly pulling the blanket tighter around himself.

"Please... please... oh God.. please..."

____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

**~ The Void ~**

____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

All at once the smothering ocean of intense panic ceased and Edward fell to his knees staring aimlessly at the white that was the ground here.

More tears began to trickle down his face, but these ones were different. They were tears of defeat, guilt, of a man beaten down by the cruelty of the hand he had been dealt. That they had all been dealt.

James watched as the man sat there on his knees not moving nor making a sound.

It was never easy to watch a sailor come to this place, acceptance was so hard.

He placed a gentle hand on the lieutenant's shoulder kneeling before him.

"Am... Am I dead, Sir?" he finally whispered softly.

James offered to him a look of empathy and a nod. "Yes Edward."

The man sniffled and buried his face into his hands his body shook with loud sobs as grief threatened to swallow him whole and never spit him back out, "I-I'm sorry Thomas... I-I'm so.... very... very sorry... please forgive me."

_________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

James swallowed thickly as he continued to watch the lieutenant grieve. 

He'd been like this for hours how many he didn't know, time went by so fast here in this place of in between. What could seem like hours to them could in actuality be days.

Even after his voice had been long lost to his howls and deep mourning sounds of despair. 

When he could no longer scream, he'd made do with rambling in his voice already so broken, and when his voice turned into a raspy, whine of a whisper he spoke softly to himself, and then when his throat was too dry, too hoarse to even whisper rendered silent from overuse... he still sat there.

Sat there. 

The man just sat there on his knees trembling with emotion, his arms wrapped around himself as he rocked himself slightly, lips were still moving and trying to speak despite his worn vocal cords. 

No sound, just the movement of lips that were wet with tears.

He could make out familiar words even without a voice to give them life for he himself had spoken them so many times but to a different person.

_'I love you'_

_'I love you' _

_'I love you'_

_'Thomas I love you' _

Over and over lips repeated a silent mantra. 

Tears still trickled freely down pale cheeks, weaving beneath the gold chains Henry had gored into hid face, and the skin around his eyes was red and puffy.

_'Oh Edward... you poor, poor man.'_

There was a voice in the back of his mind that told him that he should leave, to wander back further into the void to where most of the men were. 

At the same time though having just witnessed lieutenant Little fall apart with such an explosive outpouring of despair... caused by a heart that had been shattered into millions of tiny fragments which immolated themselves... he couldn't help but feel he should stay.

All at once Edward's entire body seized violently and the man's mouth opened in a terrified and pained shriek that sounded like one of Mr Blanky's smoker's coughs with its raspyness.

The man looked as if he we're having a fit of sorts and he didn't waste a moments time, this wasn't normal! There wasn't supposed to be pain here.

Clearly Edward was in pain though, he was wheezing out screams and blood started to seep through a section of his greatcoat on his lower arm.

Alarmed by the man's agony and most of all the sight of blood he dropped to his knees beside him trying to help him pull off his navy coat.

Edward was frenzied and his voice crackled into a shrill yelp. James could hear a disgusting ripping sound of flesh coming from his arm as he yanked the dark blue fabric off him.

The entire lower half on the sleeve of his white undershirt was saturated a deep red, and as he rolled up the long sleeves he could see a wound forming right before both their eyes.

Deep, gouging slashes by some invisible blade were sawing through the flesh all the way down to bone and Edward wailed. 

This had never happened before.

"Lieutenant Little-.. Edward look at me!" he spoke with a sense of urgency.

All at once the screams stopped and the man's struggles ceased.

Now appearing rather docile as he stared blankly at him... no, no not at him he wasn't looking at anything. 

He was in a different place.

The poor many sat rigid on his knees with back straight as a beam and hands upturned in his lap.

_'Something with Jopson?'_ Fitzjames wondered.

The Captain watched in both revulsion and awe as a chunk of flesh disintegrated like smoke from of the center of the bloody slashes on Little's arm.

What in the world... 

"Edward?" he gave the man a shake and got no response the man just stared ahead with fatigued eyes.

When his body began to tremble with fright and tears once again trickled down his face and into his beard Fitzjames knew it had something to do with Jopson.

Glancing back down at his arm he was stunned to find the wound had healed already and all that was left was five deep lines of scars. The blood on his sleeve became lighter and lighter until it vanished completely from the White fabric of his shirt.

This place was so strange.

Much to his surprise Little finally reacted in some way and that was to let out the softest sob in the world before settling onto his backside.

Voice hoarse once more he began mouthing those words again.

A tear that had gotten stuck on one of the gold chains dripped to the ground, the drop of liquid falling beneath the floor to an endless abyss, Edward stared until he hadn't been able to see it any more.

James reached out a comforting hand to place on his shoulder and the lieutenant turned to him with a glare, his own arm reaching out to shove roughly at his chest knocking him off balance and onto his arse.

Heaving a sigh he rose to his feet and began to pace silently. 

Edward whimpered softly and reached for his discarded great coat that was now no longer stained with blood.

His heart ached painfully as he watched the broken man bunch the article up on the ground and lay down upon the colorless floor using it as a pillow, rolling over onto his side with his back facing him.

_'Francis please give me a sign... what do I for?' _he prayed even though he knew it wouldn't help.

Turning to look over his shoulder he saw two figures walking their direction across the flat endless white sea, still quite some distance the equivalent of couple miles probably.

It was as he looked back to Edward that James suddenly felt the throbbing sting invading his head, like a terrible migraine.

This was Francis... something was going on he could feel his love's emotions begin running rampant.

As familiar as he was with the invasion of his thoughts and emotions at this point, it still felt so strange to him. 

The feeling of overwhelming shock that hit actually made him press a hand to his temple, trying to keep his head from spinning.

_"Francis... what's wrong?"_ he muttered aloud as that shock turned to a form of pure horror that made his legs buckle beneath him.

Edward glanced over shoulder he'd heard his voice and the shuffling of fabric as his legs gave out.

The man didn't move an inch though, simply turned his sad gaze forward again too miserable and drained to do anything else even if he wanted to. 

Lost too much in such a short amount of time to care about anything at all. 

Gritting his teeth against the flooding panic James clenched his fists and he willed himself not to cry. 

This feeling was so intense... he'd not felt such sorrow since Mr Blanky had arrived. 

It was a mourning sorrow.

Immediately his eyes snapped open wide, realization etching into his mind.

Could it be that Francis was looking at the corpse of H.M.S Terror's First Lieutenant Edward Little? 

If he was... Jopson wouldn't be far. Right? Maybe if-

He winced as that sorrow turned once again to horror, then shock, and anxiety in quick succession.

There was a hopefulness to that anxiety, sympathy and an almost... paternal amiability... relief but fear still blazing heavily.

_'Oh Francis... thank God.' _

It must be what was happening.

Francis must of found Jopson still alive. 

A weak smile graced his features for a moment for he knew Francis would do everything in his power to get them home. To get them help. 

It wasn't as if they would not know if they were to die here.

Everything that dies in that icy land comes here.

Edward let out a shuddering breath, he'd curled up into the fetal position on his side fingers tugging at his hair as he whimpered and keened softly.

A hand lay itself upon his shoulder and he turned to see Lieutenant John Irving and Thomas Blanky standing there.

It had been Mr Blanky who had touched his shoulder and the two shared a knowing expression.

Irving however gasped softly, his eyes were struck with a sort of joy and relief at the sight of his friend.

"Edward!" he exclaimed warmly.

He went to go to him and Fitzjames barely caught the man by his shoulders to hold him back. 

Edward straightened himself back out where he lay, squeezing his great coat in his arms as he rest his head on it, his shoulders shook violently though he sobbed so very silently.

The younger lieutenant huffed a breath but he didn't try to argue when he shook his head in warning.

Edward needed space.

_________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

Mr Blanky decided to stay with him for company which James agreed with.

Maybe better for someone who knew him on more of a closer level to sit with him.

Irving was too wound up and eager to comfort him to be trusted with sitting there, as mean as that sounded.

Now as he and John made their way back to the others, James couldn't help pondering the facts.

First Lieutenant Edward Little's arrival to this spiritual place had, indeed, been the hardest one to watch, without a doubt.

He also hoped it would be the last familiar new arrival.

Maybe if he prayed hard enough for such a thing... maybe.


	2. Solace

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The men try to offer Edward some solace in the aftermath of his arrival to The Void.
> 
> Terror Bingo: **Solace**

Mr Blanky gruffed out a cough around the stem of his pipe, having inhaled a bit too much, as he continued to keep Edward company.

  
Not that the man was much himself. 

  
The poor man was absolutely inconsolable, hysterical, and there was an unyielding anger, surely simmering just beneath his skin as he continued to lay on the invisible floor of the void, his shoulders hitching every now and then with silent sobs that were occasionally followed by rasping cough, gasp for breath, or both. Oh, or a small pitiful hiccup. 

  
"T-Thomas… Thomas, I-I… I love you… please… I-I am so.. so sorry… Oh.. Oh God n-no…" 

  
Thomas felt awfully for the lieutenant, he remembered that horrible sensation he'd felt himself from his beloved Esther and their girls. 

  
He heaved a sigh around his pipe and the smoke billowed forth from his lips. 

  
"I'm sorry… I'm sorry… W-Why did this happen?” the poor man's whisper barely reached his ears.

* * *

It was several hours of the same painful display before Thomas finally noticed the sobs become softer, the trembling lessen more and more, breathing evened out into a soft and steady rhythmic pattern. 

_   
'Good Christ, the lad cried himself to sleep.'  _ he realized. 

  
Perhaps now was the time he should approach the bereaved sailor, when he was completely and utterly exhausted. 

  
With a grunt and a small pop of some joints he rose to his feet taking a moment to balance with his false leg beneath him before approaching the poor broken soul. 

  
Once he was near he maneuvered around to the front of him so he could see his face and crouched carefully (with a bit of effort on the side of balance) he placed a hand on the younger man’s shoulder.

  
A sharp inhale emitted from him before he finally opened brown eyes that were red, puffy, wet, and irritated as they focused on him for a moment. 

  
The former lieutenant didn’t say anything, instead he lowered his gaze back to the white void of the invisible floor.

  
He was broken, well, he supposed they all were at this point, but this man was definitely broken. 

  
“Edward.” he addressed him softly causing dark eyes to move back up to look at his face.

  
They stared at each other for a long stretch of silence an understanding coming over them both until he dared break it. “C’mon lad, let’s go find the others.” 

  
Little didn’t say a word, he continued to stare with miserable eyes that started to glisten again, but he did offer the slightest of nods with a shaky exhale of breath.

  
“Aye, let’s get ya up.” Thomas said, reaching down and taking hold of the man’s bicep.

  
It was harder than expected to get the man to his feet, he was absolute dead weight from exhaustion. 

  
Once on his feet, however, he moved on his own as he led. Thomas felt his own exhaustion seep into his bones every time he looked over his shoulder to see how he was coming along. 

  
The man's gait was staggering, his legs trembled anew with emotion and fatigue as he followed, sniffling and choking on small sobs the whole time. 

  
"Aye, I feel my girls all the time." he admitted after a few long moments of walking in the mostly eerie silence. 

  
He’d already expected to receive no response from the younger man, so he wasn’t at all off put when he received just that. Despite this, he continued to speak offering the heartbroken sailor some sort of solace with his words. 

  
“Etsher, that woman’s always been a tough one. Her pain is still with me, though I’ve gotten used to it. ... but it has lessened overtime. I also feel her strength.” 

  
Edward’s sniffles had since ceased, so Thomas knew he was listening.

  
“The girls on the other hand, their grief is yet something fierce. Especially from my little Hannah.”

_   
‘Oh my little Hannah…’  _

  
Thomas found himself drifting further into his thoughts. This place was strange and at times it was absolutely maddening. As a jewish man it took him a long time to get used to it, he still wasn’t, but it was more tolerable now that he felt more of his beloved Esther’s undying love for him and for the girls than her grief. 

His poor Esther, she hadn’t wanted him to go on this expedition in the first place, his beautiful, bold, dark-haired beauty had blatantly stated he was too old for such an expedition. 

  
The memory brought a smile to his grizzled face. 

  
Oh how he missed her. 

  
“They… do they feel us?” Edward asked suddenly, his words mildly interrupted with a hiccup.

  
It was the miserably spoken words that snapped him back to their present. He honestly had never thought about the possibility of this. 

  
Did his Esther feel his own grief and suffering? His longing? His love?

  
All the men’s loved ones, did they feel their distress?

  
Realizing that he didn’t have the answer to the younger man’s question he shrugged. “To that, I am not sure lad.”

* * *

It had been unbearable and absolutely nerve-wracking for John to leave Edward in such a state.

  
He knew he should feel more sorrow at the arrival of Lieutenant Little than he did, especially with what it meant, for it meant loud and clear that the man had died. His life had ended far too soon, much like the rest of the men here.

  
At the same time though, it was nice to see him again… even given the state of the man.

  
Once they had seen Sir John walking on two legs, the man showing them a scar where the leg they had buried in the ice had been severed by that great beast, Lieutenant Le Vesconte tried to warn them all of what he’d done to Little’s face.

  
The silver-haired man felt overwhelming guilt for what he’d done, even if it wasn’t his fault.

  
It really wasn’t.

  
He had been sick in the head in his end, just like several of the last sailors who arrived in this place they just called The Void.

  
Captain Francis Rawdon Moria Crozier.

  
}First Lieutenant Edward Little.

  
Third Lieutenant Thomas Jopson. 

  
The last men standing.

  
In all honesty, if it hadn’t been for the fact that they were all waiting on the last three men of the Franklin Expedition’s crew to join them… he wouldn’t have recognized Little. 

  
Ever stoic Edward Little, now all bushy beard, long hair, and golden chains gored into his once handsome face.

  
A very haunting sight indeed. 

  
You add the intensity of his emotional breakdown upon arriving… it was almost unfathomable.

  
Some men had handled the arrival better than others.

  
John Bridgens had welcomed death with a solemn look of misery and despair that had instantaneously brightened to a beaming smile at just the sight of Mister Peglar, Terror’s foretop captain.

  
Mister Hickey had come here laughing like a lunatic before he calmed he was always following Tozer around despite the fact the man always punched him in the face.

  
Commander Fitzjames had been relatively at ease but once he’d felt Captain Crozier’s grief the flood gates had been unleashed.

  
Doctor Goodsir, of course, came in with wide fascinated eyes filled with awe at the profound wonder of this place.

  
“Well, we got new addition lads.” came the unmistakable voice of Mr Blanky. 

  
Jumping in surprise and slight excitement, John looked up to find both Blanky and Little approaching their group. 

  
Tears still trickled heavily down Little’s face and it made John’s heart throb painfully in his chest as he rose to his feet towards his fellow lieutenant.

  
“Edward.” he addressed him softly as Mr Blanky moved to speak with Commander Fitzjames. 

  
Slowly, miserable brown eyes lifted to peer into his pasture green, instantly they seemed to fill with more tears. 

  
The poor man made a b-line straight for him and wrapped his arms around him. “John…” 

* * *

Edward couldn’t believe what he was hearing… nothing here made sense. 

  
This great, white place that was occasionally decorated with random rocks and small flowering plants, birds in the endless white sky.

  
All the sailors he’d watched die, buried, or burned their bodies in mass memorial… all of them were here.

  
Ones he’d missed dearly, Lieutenant John Irving, the man who had been such a good friend to both he and Jopson despite his own conflict with their relationship as a God-fearing man. Commander Fitzjames their dashing younger captain. Hodgson even if he’d betrayed them. Mr Blanky, the man who could make him laugh on the worst of days. Lieutenant Le Vesconte even if their friendship had been terribly strained in the end… 

  
It had never felt right to him how he’d put the man down, freed him from his madness. It had made himself feel ill and horrible.

  
People he wanted to hurt and he wanted to be as far away from as possible. Especially Mr Hickey and Sergeant Tozer. The men who ruined everything. 

  
“I’m sorry, Edward.” John’s voice reached his ears from where he sat beside him. 

  
The words made him choke up again, “I should be sorry.” 

  
John looked at him as if he had grown a second head. “What on Earth for?”

  
Edward felt his throat constrict painfully and it took him several times to swallow the lump in his throat before he could even speak, his thoughts wandering the entire time.

  
He was supposed to go on that trek with Hickey, John had requested not to be put on tasks with the man due to fear of harm, had addressed it to the Captain who agreed. Especially since he had reported Hickey’s crimes aboard Terror.

  
It was he who should have gone, but he stayed behind because… Hodgson had distracted him with something.

  
Then of course it was revealed… or theorised with his disappearance that the second lieutenant was in cohorts with Hickey. 

  
“I was supposed to go on that trek.” 

  
John’s eyes softened considerably and he placed a reassuring hand on his shoulder.

  
“It wasn’t your fault, Edward, neither was your death. Jopson will be just fine, we just have to have faith.”

  
The words sent him into another breakdown as he embraced his friend tightly, “I loved him John…. I loved him… I want him back…”

  
John swallowed down his discomfort by the conversation thickly as he patted Edward’s back soothingly, “I know Ned… I know.”


End file.
